Here I am yet again bringing you fall fashion trends from my perspective. I’m very unfashionable and I sometimes think from a male perspective on things. Bad news guys, this years Fall trends for women are HORRID! I mean just when you thought Spring 2011 was horrible wait till you see the trends of Fall.
#1. Someone get out the Twister Board! Polka Dots are IN!
Polka dot tops, skirts, dresses, coats…yes polka dots are a go this fall. Wearing Dotted clothing isn’t all THAT bad but I just saw a few run way pictures and immediately thought of playing Twister. I don’t even think I own a garment with dots…oh wait hold up, I have adorab;e polka dot panties…with lace and lace is in too but I’ll get to that later.
Picture above: Polka Dot NO NO! I’m actually dizzy from looking at these pictures.
Picture Below: Polka dot acceptable. Not so bad, it’s actually kinda cute and does not make me dizzy. I’d wear something like this. But I would NOT top it off with a Polka Dot sweater or jacket…
#2. Lace on the outside?
I saw some pretty bad lace fashion photos but alas they were run way pics and those do not count. NOBODY actually does outside in Runway clothes right? Well…other than Lady Gaga anyway. Lace isn’t so bad, I find it uncomfortable if it’s just Lace alone but if it’s lace over top of something it isn’t so bad. I have a cute lace skirt…and lace panties that are full of polka dots…and well…I have a Lace skirt YAY!Below is a pic of a cute lace dress. Black lace is always acceptable to me. Just don’t wear it sheer with only a Bra underneath…talk about Tacky!
#3 The BOLD and the Beautiful.
Bold solid colours. Ok…NO NO NO NO NO! The ONLY colour anyone should wear solid is shades like Black, white, grey etc. But Bold Yellow, Bold Blue, Bold neon green??? What the heck is the fashion industry THINKING? “Hey Ladies lets go out in our Bold colours today! You be the Pink Power Ranger and I’ll be the Red Power Ranger!”
Just don’t do it. Do one bold article of clothing and mix it with neutrals or something…wearing a sweater and pants that match in the exact color is just wrong…especially yello, orange, bright red…anything that can make you look like a power ranger.
I have a few bold looks up my sleeve though, I plan on having Bold nail colours and Bold hair colours…in fact I’m going to dye my hair blue, that’s pretty bold. Think that’s silly? Just wait till you see what I plan on doing with my hair at Christmas. Oh yeah, I’m going to rock nerdy Christmas sweaters with festive hair all December? Why? Because I’m unfashionable that’s why!
#4. Austin Power’s called, he’d like the 60’s back
The 60’s is trending too…I have no comment. Wait…Polka dots are so 60’s and so are Bold colours! So go rock out Twister Boards!
#5. Man up!
Women wearing Men’s Clothes! So not sexy. But I wear my husband’s Boxers around the house sometimes and I ALWAYS steal his sweaters and T-shirts. I’ve been doing it for years! I’m all set! Actually by men’s wear they do mean blazers and stuff…girls in suits?I think there was a news article the other day about how guys can’t stand it when girls wear men’s suits. So take note ladies…don’t cross dress. Their suits are uncomfy anyways…try stealing their hoodies, now those are comfy.
#6 Plaid!
Now I’m sure they mean cute dainty plaid right? Like cute little plaid ponchos and jackets? Probably all in BOLD colors too because remember ladies, Bold is IN! Plaid is ALWAYS a hit where I’m from, I live in a hick town so the whole Lumber jack look for both men and women is in. I don’t own a plaid jacket yet but when I do it will be lumber jack red and I will use it when I go outside to cut wood. I’ll look like a pro!
#7 Large Shoulders
Shoulder pads are in? Is that hockey shoulder pads or shoulder pads shoulder pads. Eww I always hated Big shoulders…women are supposed to have little soft shoulders not 80’s style square shoulders. If I get a shirt or dress and the thing has shoulder pads the first thing I do is take them out. Shoulder pads are LAME! Don’t do it…it looks so stupid. Then again if you have a young shild who always sleeps in your arms those shoulder pads could come in handy!
#8 Perplum
Perplum…I’m even laughing at the word. Perplum is over exaggerated hips. Okay Big shoulders and big hips too? I’m sticking with Last years fall trends, screw this year’s! What was last years trends anyway? Whatever, perplum looks dumb too.Look at the picture below! Polka Dot perplum! RAWR!
#9 Leather
Dominatrix style leather is in right now but I’m just going to pretend that it’s not and cute leather biker jackets are in. I own a pair of leather boots too. Pairing up a leather jacket with a cute T-shirt is always cool looking…wearing skin tight leather on the other hand is meant to remain in the bedroom. And if you are over 40 PLEASE don’t don cougar style leather EVER!
Above pic: CREEPY!
Below Pic: Cute. Well I’m only saying cute because that’s a picture of me in a leather jacket and HEY LOOK a Superman T-shirt! WIN!
#10 Black and White
I bet you black and white is in IF it’s Black and white Perplum with Polka Dots and lace paired with a dominatrix style black leather jacket. Or maybe Checkerboard black and white? Or how about we just accept that ANY style of Black and white is rending and just be happy abut it. I love Black and white, I have lots of black and white…more black than white BUT I have black and white.
Above is Black and white done right. It’s also Polka Dot done right and bold (The shoes) done right as well as Men’s wear done right. If your going to do men’s wear pair it up with a skirt or dress. I might just try that, I just need a polka dot dress! 😉
And that’s My fall fashion report. Don’t take all my opinions seriously unless you want to…I’m not fashionable at all, in fact I still wear some clothes I wore in highschool!
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