10 years ago, a disaster was released.

Posted: September 4, 2011 in disaster

There is nothing more destructive than turning 14 and going into high school. 14, MOST destructive disaster phase of a teen girl’s life.

Grade 9. An entire decade ago I entered my milestone of being a high school freshman. I can’t belive how fast time flies. Better yet I can’t believe how much disaster my Grade 9 experience was. It was probably one of my most disasterous eras in my life. I keep looking back at my highschool experience and can’t help but remember some of the moments of my freshman year.

So naturally I’m going to share this. It is safe to say that I can’t really damage my immage with events from 10 years ago. And while I tend to keep my past in the past I just can’t pass this up.

Grade 9 was filled with plenty of funny and embarassing disasters. There was falling down the 3rd floor stairs right infront of a bunch of Senior students. I’ve fallen UP the stairs at least 7 times although I’m sure half the school did the same. I had a loli pop ripped right out of my mouth by a guidance councillor right in front of a bunch of people. I peed my pants laughing…three times, once outside, once in Phys Ed and once in class…Only one of these occurences were witessed. I sat in gum at least twice. I kicked my self defence instructor in the knee because I missed the pad I was supposed to kick. There was a pretty horrid dance routine I did in gym class…and it’s on film, lucky me. I have stuttered and sounded like a complete moron. There were at least 100 ADD related moments, although my attention span sucks so I can’t remember half of them. Someone made me cry once and my makeup got EVERYWHERE. I was a lemming so I followed my friends everywhere and I was too timmid to ever stand up for myself. I was a push over and some of my friends literally PUSHED me over. I made a really mean christmas door decoration dedicated to a particular hockey player who is now famous all because my friends put me up to it…then when I did it they got pissed. I fell asleep in french class. I had the world’s most unorganized back pack. I got dissed every day by a pro Junior Hockey team because I was part of the Lemming gang. I was so quiet in some classes that people intentionally bugged me. And there’s more.

But the event that is most memorable was the fact I became a puck bunny. Not the Hang out with Hockey players Puck Bunny, I was a “Scram, we want nothing to do with you” Puck Bunny. But Yet we persisted, even after we were directly told to get lost we were still dumb enough stalk the team. Deep down inside I went to games hoping specific Hockey players *Cough* Nathan Horton *cough* would get their butts kicked by the other team. And then out of random happenstance I fell head over heels for one of the Hockey players. This counts for 85% of my Grade 9 disasters. Maybe 90%

I was in love, like if there was a scale from Meh to Justin Bieber, I loved this guy more than a Belieber who has a Bieber shrine loves Justin Bieber. This guy was my Bieber. I wanted to date him, no I wanted to marry him. I wanted to just walk right up to him and tell him how much I loved him and I couldn’t do it! He looked my direction and my face turned beat red. I walked by trying not to make eye contact. I cried in Art Class after my friend walked up to him and told him I liked him. He tried to talk to me ONCE and I actually booked it. I’m sure he got a great view of my back as I ran down that ramp, out the door, straight home hyperventilating. I did run into the house screaming “He almost talked to me!!!” My mom was like “Almost?” “Yeah! He was asking us if we were going to go to the practice and he was about to talk to me and I took off. Mom? Can I go to the practice!?”

I went to the practice. I thought it was so cute that he broke his hockey stick while showing off his slap shot (That actually kind of sounds dirty…) I sat there with somewhat of guts…I had enough guts to walk into the arena and sit with my friends. I also had coffee which helped a little, ten more Timmies and I would have talked to him I swear!

I bought his pictures, $5 a peice…seriously, five bucks is like A lot when your 14! I had at least 10 pictures. I even had a key chain made…

It gets better!

Valentine’s Day…

My friends had crushes on hockey players too so they wanted to do something special for valentine’s day. So here I was thinking “I’m going to send him this cute teddy bear.” TEDDY BEAR!? Seriously what was I thinking? Man, some of his team mates got chocolate and I sent a bear…he must have felt ripped off! We were sneaky too, we brought the gifts to the guidance office and they got called down at lunch time…I was all proud of myself. Then I skipped on over to the practice and that’s when my friend broke the news that she had included a heart shaped picture of me with the bear…I almost dropped dead.It was a creepy picture of me too! Worse, I look like a 10 year old in that picture. It was taken at the Hopewell rocks in New Brunswick, wind blowing my hair, me making a creepy seductive face…>< no wonder I almost dropped dead. I am so HAPPY he didn’t confront me, or thank me or even look at me, infact he hid on the other side of the ice rink…thankyou thankyou thankyou! We were wished a Happy Valentine’s day by other members of the team who were CLEARLY envious They didn’t get chocolate.

If I were in his shoes I’d be like “Man, I don’t get chocolate? And why is this creepy 15 year old girl sending me a picture of her self…CREEEEEEEPYYYYYY!” Also take note that back in grade 9 I looked like a skinny vulcan…or maybe a monkey, or a Vulcan Monkey! I wasn’t attractive. Cute MAYBE, hot? Heck no.

I avoided walking anywhere near the back part of the school where they hung out. It took weeks to gather the guts to walk by them again. I saw my crush walk down the halls once and I actually hid. pretending to enter the Wrong classroom was less embarassing than having my crush see me.

Then the team left at the end of the season, they went back to their home towns. The rest of my grade 9 life was so uneventful…a void just filled up. The halls were so boring. I walked in and out of school with a sigh. I finished 9th grade as a loner actually. I had no friends by the end. Everyone decided to disown me. There was a giant neon “L” on my forehead. And that’s when I changed, thats when I went from cute, innocent minor Niner to cute somewhat innocent Punk. Because grade 10 I would be rocking chains, wrist bands, lots of dark makeup and nothing was going to hold my skinny butt back! (yes I went through the poser punk phase)

10 years ago, disaster of a life time. Thankfully grade 9 events had absolutely NOTHING to do with who I became later on. But they make for a pretty funny story. Just Typical me. And today, I just can’t stop laughing at how silly I was.


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